Quotations Useful One-liners

• When you truly don't give a toss what people think of you, you have accomplished an amazing level of freedom.
  
  
• You don't need to drive me crazy, I'm near enough to walk.
  
  
• The only problem with the gene pool is that there isn't a lifeguard.
  
  
• A talk should be like a woman's skirt, short enough to be interesting and long enough to cover the essentials - Churchill.
  
  
• Last night I dreamed about drowning in an ocean made out of orange soda. It took me a while to work out it was just a Fanta sea.
  
  
• Let everyone who advocates war be enrolled in a special regiment of advance-guards, for the front of every storm, of every attack, to lead them all! - Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy.
  
  
• Diplomacy is the art of telling people to go to hell in such a way that they ask for directions - Churchill.
  
  
• Diplomacy is the art of telling people to go to hell in such a way that they enjoy the trip - Alternate version.
  
  
• If I do a job in 30 minutes, it's because I spent 10 years learning how to do that job in 30 minutes. You owe me for the years, not the minutes.
  
  
• You can tell Monopoly is an old game because there is a luxury tax and rich people can go to jail.
  
  
• Considering what Bruce Wayne and Tony Stark did with their vast wealth, Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos should be ashamed of themselves.
  
  
• Somewhere, someone's therapist knows all about YOU !
  
  
• How much to hire a church singing group ? - You mean a choir ? - Fine, how much to acquire a church singing group ?
  
  
• The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it - Albert Einstein.
  
  
• The Sleepy Sentinal: Faithless the watch that I kept, now I have none to keep. I was slain because I slept, now I'm slain I sleep. Let no man reproach me, whatever watch is unkept. I sleep because I am slain. They slew me because I slept.
  
  
• A Dead Statesman: I could not dig, I dared not rob, therefore I lied to please the mob. Now all my lies are proved untrue, and I must face the men I slew. What tale shall serve me here among mine angry and defrauded young ?